More Christmas Buzzkill by concerned Dumbasses.

So a news blurb I heard walking out the door this morning stated and I quote "His belly jiggled like a bowl full of jelly....Is Santa Claus' lifestyle giving the wrong impression to our kids?".....I paused at the door, shook my head, and kept walking to the car.  Not sure who/whom the jackass/jackasses are that prompted this whole line of questioning?  Whomever you are, I have one thing to say to you....."Shut the Fuck Up!!"  Buzzkill, politically correct, assholes just need to shut up right now.   Do you want to know what is giving the wrong impression to our kids?  Their damn sorry excuses for parents, that's who.   If Jr. is fat, it's probably because Mom and Dad are heifers.  If you shove shit down his throat all day you will get an unhealthy child.  Garbage in, garbage out.  Kids don't want to be fat, trust me on this.  Other kids are cruel and will make fun of them and no kid wants that.  Tell Jr...."hey if you don't get off your ass and go out and play you will get fat and the other kids will make fun of you" then Jr. will get off his ass and go play.   Or perhaps be a parent and tell Jr. "I'm sorry, only an hour of video games after school then it's outside for you to play." or get Jr. a Wii and Wii Fit so he has to get up off the couch and be active.  And for God's sake do yourself a favor and eat better crap and give it to Jr so he won't be unhealthy.

Tom Brady: The New Douchebag Champion.

Last time I wrote an entry like this it was to proclaim Kanye West the Douchebag of the Year.  Sorry Kanye, I'm going to let you finish but Tom Brady has that honor at this time.

As the readers of this blog may or may not know I'm a fan of the Oakland Raiders Football Team.  A team that won't ever be good again until Al Davis dies, but I digress.  Back almost a decade or so ago there was a playoff game with the Raiders vs. Patriots where the game was decided in the Pats favor by a questionable call.  Tom Douchey was in the pocket about ready to throw; he pump faked and brought the ball back, as he was bringing the ball back he was hit by a Raider defender and sacked, coughing up the ball which the Raiders recovered.   The turnover was overturned because the Official on the field said it was a forward pass and not a pump fake.  Everyone else, except Pats fans of course, says they saw a tuck and not forward pass.  There's the background of my dislike for Brady....although this is not what makes him the Douchebag of the year.  Oh no.  He has gained that title for his lack of caring about the crotchfruit he keeps spawning with various women.  Okay with two women....that we know about anyway!  So Doucheboy is dating some actress...don't care about the name honestly there's too much of this going around Hollywood lately.  Let's have unprotected sex and spawn!!!  Yay what fun!!!!  Folks have more money than sense.  While she is pregnant with his crotchfruit he dumps her for some Supermodel.....I hate that term.  Honestly I've never seen any of these bimbos in a cape flying through the air saving the day.   Someone needs to save them from being in a Skeletor look alike contest.  Three Words Bimbos: Five Dollar Footlong.   His son Jack is born but never once have you seen Doucheboy acknowledge the lad's existence.  Not once.  The kid is two now, and yet Doucheboy still acts like he doesn't give two shits about the kid.  Apparently Jack's Daddy is a check.  At least a check only disappoints when it bounces.  Now he and Bimbo Barbie have just had a child together.  They had a name picked out, but bimbo didn't like it and she's waiting for Doucheboy to have 2 minutes out of his "busy day" (you throw a damn ball Dude....how freaking busy can you be?  Besides, this isn't a pet it's a Human Freaking Being) to help her nail down another name.  It's been a week now.  Seven fricking days and this asshole's excuse is "Well I'm busy reviewing game tape and preparing for next weeks game...I just don't have time."  I got a name for the kid.  How about "Daddy don't give a shit about me" Brady or "Daddy just can't pull out in time" Brady or perhaps "Let the Nanny name it because she's going to be the one actually raising it" Brady. 

Update:  Yay!!!!! Karma has bitten Mr. Douche in the ass.  The Pats are out of the playoffs.......poor poor Douchey Boy......

The Christmas Truce

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christmas_truce

Click on the link to read one of the best stories of WWI.  I like to post this link at this time of year because it's a great story for the Season.