The Tennessee Chainsaw Massacre

Look what I just bought.....yep I now own a chainsaw. Never thought I'd ever need a chainsaw, but I do. On our property (it's still funny to say that....our property.....) there are 10 trees. Said Trees spew leaves like a hose during the Fall. To deal with the amount of leaves, we have built a mulch box. Three of the trees are a variety of hedge that was allowed to grow taller than they should have. These are partially evergreen....which means that they are always losing their leaves.....constantly. They are also not real pretty trees, and one is right next to the house (can we say I have to clean that particular rain gutter alot.) We've been wanting to get rid of them, but I could not forsee myself with a bow saw cutting down three trees in one weekend.....maybe one tree and I'd be exhausted afterwards.....so it was decided that we could do one of two things: 1. keep asking my Father-in-law (who's almost 70) to drag his butt down to our house with his chainsaw (he lives about an hour away) or
2. Get our own freaking chainsaw.

Look at the picture...isn't it lovely??? I will now hang it in my shed alongside our weed whacker, leaf blower and electric hedge trimmer. We opted for an electric one because I hate gas outdoor tools. My weed whacker is electric and does just fine, the hedge trimmer as well as the leaf blower are electric as well. The only gas outdoor tool I have is my push mower.....and gas mowers are better.......besides the electric chainsaw has enough horsepower and is lighter and easier to control than a gas one. Besides the three "hedge" trees, there is an evil crab apple tree. It blooms very pretty, but once the blooms are gone, you get these little apples that aren't really edible, they fall and get squished, etc which attracts lots of bees......and this particular tree gets bag worms. They make large cocoons that look like a huge spiders egg sac......this particular batch was ginormous. The entire tree was crawling with bag worms. They look like those fuzzy caterpillers that used to be prevelant in California when I was a kid only smaller......that tree will be the first to taste the chainsaw of retribution!!! In it's place we are going to be planting some Thompson seedless grapes and some blueberries. The next tree to go is a sad one. In Tennessee there is a variety of tree called "Redbud" because of the bright pinkish red blooms that sprout from it during the spring. They are nice trees that grow anywhere (you can see some along I-40 growing out of rocks....) but this one in our yard, like its bretheren that died last year, is destined to be put down. It's not blooming all that well anymore, there are hardly any leaves on it....it's a dead tree. Time to hack it down before it falls down. The good thing though, they have seed pods that drift around, and there are a number of redbud saplings growing in our planter boxes.......just stick a new one on the stump of the old and it will grow. They grow fast too.

Freeway Culture: You people don't know the meaning of traffic!

The one really frustrating thing about living in Middle Tennessee is that folks around here have no clue how to drive on a freeway.  One of my co-workers is originally from Memphis (West Tennessee) and she agrees.  The majority of drivers on the freeways (they call them interstates....I will call them freeways) would last exactly 5 seconds on a Bay Area freeway.   They don't know how to enter the freeway out here.  Normally you should be going about freeway speed when you enter traffic.  Not these Morons.  They tool along at 35, and when you think they should speed up to get on the freeway and you back off a bit to let them in, they don't go any faster than 35.  I usually blow past them.  They also have no concept of "close the gap" around here.   There is a large amount of Semi traffic in Middle Tennessee and thus large blocks of slowness occur on the road.  But, it's only limited (by law) to the two right hand lanes.  Now the fast lane is a diamond lane so no driving in it, but the lane next to it is usually clear.  Do you think these idiots will pass the blocks of slow moving trucks???? Hell no!  I usually get trapped in the slow lane until I get my break.  I then show these morons how it's done back home.  Two years of commuting from Walnut Creek to South San Francisco has prepared me on how to drive on a busy freeway.  I pass one idiot, pass another, speed up to the speed limit of 70 and lo and behold, there is a gap the size of California between us and the next batch of traffic.   I don't get it.  The two idiots I passed could have changed one lane to the left and not have had to be stuck in a large group of Semis.  They just don't care.  I've seen idiots come to almost a complete stop on the freeways out here to let someone over.  Apparently folks out here are courteous to a fault!!!!  Or the ones that have miles and miles of empty road in front of them, but they are glad to putt along at 45-55 mph without a worry in the world.  The limit is 70 idiot.....that's for a reason!!!!  We also have what I think is a stupid State Law in regards to freeways out here.  It's called the "move over" Law.  It states, that if there is an emergency vehicle on the side of the freeway with it's lights flashing, you have to move one lane over if you can do so safely to go past them.  If you can't get over, then you are to slow down to like 45-50 and go past the vehicle.  People out here can't handle merging and getting on a damn freeway, now you are asking them to jump over a lane at the first sign of a THP giving someone a speeding ticket.  Just imagine how that works........it cause more backups and more confusion than it prevents Officers from being killed.  Yep, that's the whole reason this law exists.   Apparently the idiot drivers out here are worse rubberneckers than those at home and have run over THP Officers doing their duty or crashed into the Police Cruiser because they were looking to see what happened, and their hands followed their heads.   I understand wanting to protect Officers, but this is not the way to do it.  THP never approach from the Passenger side of the vehicle like the CHP does back home.  No, they mosey on up to the drivers side, right smack dab in the middle of traffic!!!!  No wonder they get run over.  I miss driving around people who know what they are doing.  In the Bay Area, everything and anything is off of a freeway.  Out here, not so much.  Lots of side streets and surface roads get you to where you need to be around here.  I laugh at folks who complain about the morning commute around here.   As if you can call it traffic......Hell these people couldn't handle the Maze, the Toll Plaza, the Caldecott Tunnel, the 80-101 split......they don't know what traffic is.  In the city I live in, we have a new strip mall.  It's actually rather nice.  The street in front of it, Mount Juliet Road, has become very busy.  I hear people bitch and complain about it the whole time.  For my friends back home, picture El Camino near Hillsdale Mall on a busy Saturday.....that's the amount of traffic.  Pansies......you don't know the meaning of traffic!!!!

Italian Culture: You're Mafia right?

As I've mentioned before, my Family background is Sicillian. My Ancestors on both sides came from small villages in and round Palermo. Most of my Ancestors were hard working fishermen and laborers (there was even a famous ditch digger turned conscript soldier during WWII who's case keeps being referred to regarding the whole Gunatanamo Bay prisoner situation...Google Gaetano Territo) and yes there were some Mafioso. Italians have always been portrayed on TV and in Film as one of a few things:
1. Mobsters. Yep, apparently all Italians are in the Mafia according to TV and Film. Well.....there is some truth to this. Back in the days of prohibition many an average Giuseppi worked for the Mafia in some capacity. There is a story of a Great Uncle who died in a warehouse fire protecting the Don's booze from the G-Men who were raiding it. He wasn't Mafia, but because it was the Depression, he took whatever job he could get. Also if you remember there were lots of signs that said "No Micks. No Wops." on lot's of storefronts.

2. Hot Headed Street punks. You know like Francis from Stripes and a dozen other movies set in New York or Chicago or Philly. You know the archetype; wears leather, slicked back black hair (dances disco.....) grabs his crotch a lot and says "fugghedaboutit" alot. Honestly....some truth to that as well. New York Italians have that "attitude" about them. All the Italians I know are very passionate people who don't hold back and let you know what's what. If you've never been to an Italian Family outing before and find yourself invited to one, beware. It will be loud, with tons of background conversation going on. People will be talking over each other, getting mad at each other, laughing, crying, shouting, etc etc. It's very overwhelming for Non-Italians.

3. The big stupid mook. You know, like Rocky Balboa or Vinnie Barbarino. He's a big lug, strong but simple. Heck you can find that kind of person in every ethnic culture.

Now you may think I'm complaining about this, but I'm not. I could care less. Showing a bunch of Italians sitting around eating dinner and talking would be boring. Showing a Teamster like my Dad driving around delivering bread would be boring. The Italian Architect designing something.....boring. Oh wait, let's just insert Russian, Black, Latino, etc for Italian and guess what? Boring TV and a boring movie. If the Sopranos had been a show about Italian Opera Singers.....it wouldn't have lasted 7 seasons??? It's about Mobsters and, like The Godfather and Goodfellas before it, is great TV. I've always been happy that we Italians have never been branded minorities; it would suck. People don't discrminate against me because of it. I will never hear "Watch out for those Italians. You know how they can be..." As I was telling my friend Brian last night on the phone, I'm glad everyone thinks we're in the Mafia.....it keeps people from screwing with you for fear of retaliation.

And There Was Much Rejoicing

I just read that Rosie "Big Mouth" O'Donnel is leaving the View. Thank God....now we won't have to hear her name anymore in the news. What that show could use is Ellen DeGeneres. I've seen her show a few times and was impressed by how entertaining it was. Food for though Barbara.......

Corporate Culture IV: Don't get me started....

Actually it will get me started. Okay so I had to move to Tenneessee....I've already addressed that in an older post. I didn't want to move until I had a job secured out there, but I lucked out and ended up being eligble to collect unemployment. Apparently if you have to voluntarily leave employment because of your Spouse (ie if they get transferred to another State, it's not your fault you have to quit and move), in this case a Court Decision, then you are eligble. Wow....I could move right away then. When I got here I did the whole Monster, Career Builder thing. I got on with a Company called Spherion. The placement folks. I took the job at Amec Earth and Environmental. I did because I was tired of not working and wanted a steady income so I could move the Hell out of Cookeville and closer to Nashville. That's also been addressed with a pretty damn hysterical comment that just helps prove my point. What can I say.....Amec is like Tricor. Management don't give a damn about it's employees. The new trend is to foist more of the expense of Health Insurance on the employee. If I was to get insurance for me, Cat and Liv, I'd have no check left. This company does things so ass backwards it's not even funny. At BKF we used the accouting software Vision made by Deltek. It was okay, but we used to complain about it. I'd rather have it than the piece of crap we use called BST. It's slow, it fails, it locks up.....God it sucks. You ask for help or complain about it and the attitude is "it's what we got so live with it". Thats like telling a Carpenter to use tacks to nail 2x4's together!!!! Our Office Manager and Safety Dweeb are the worst. Morons both. The billing department is in it's own room (not in cubicle land) and when the power goes out it gets pretty damn dark in there. One of our Senior Admins saw this and went and got AP (arrogant prick) the Safety Dweeb. She pointed out that it was a safety issue (ie tripping over a desk in the dark and killing oneself....) and his attitude was like "what do you want me to do about it?" He gave us a spiel about how expensive the wall mounted safety lights are, etc....I said all we really need is a couple of flashlights. His response "Well if it will make you happy I guess I can get you some." WTF??????? He was an complete condescending ass. I felt like saying "That's okay....what will really make me happy is when I'm collecting my 2.5 million dollar check after I've sued your asses...." EW our Office Manager is an idiot. Just stupid and useless. Today was the kicker. We had a mandatory safety meeting (Lord knows papercuts are a huge hazard when shuffling paper) and Safety Dweeb bored us to tears about prevention and dealing with injuries. EW the OM made his spiel at the end saying "Well you have to use your head with injuries. If you sprain your ankle, there is no need to go to the ER, just calm down and assess the situation. You really don't need to go to the ER for that kind of injury." Everyone started mumbling and whispering to each other. Can you say Liable????? I thought you could. Idiots, idiots!!!!

Warning Signs

So as Human Beings we have a genetically encoded warning beacon that becomes customized over time to filter out the false alarms.  We know the glowing orange metal coil on the electric range is hot.  We, of course had to be taught this.  Our parents or the experience of getting burned taught us the glowing orange coil is hot.  We have that so ingrained in our heads that we sometimes get careless around the glowing orange coil and get burned.  Driving really fast is exhilarating and dangerous.  Your adrenaline flows like crazy and you have that sense of "holy crap....one stupid little over-correction and I'm a dead man seatbelt and airbag won't matter at that speed...." then we usually slow down.  Unless you are the Perfect Line who often races vehicles and enjoys it immensely.  He has trained himself how to drive a vehicle at high speeds.  He knows just what his car is capable of, and just what he as the driver is capable of.   There are warning signs everyday that we ignore, and we are lucky to survive to live another day.  Ever walk down the street and catch someone out of the corner of your eye?  There could be a handful of people around you, but somehow that one person caught your attention.  Why?  Usually when we are walking down a street it's to get to a location; some destination that is on our mind.  So why should this random stranger distract us momentarily?  What does it mean and what should we do/have done about it?  If it is just you and the random stranger and it's dark....you should run and make all kinds of noise.  That little momentary distraction was your warning bell going off.  Your primitive mind is telling you "creep alert...watch out for that guy." 

 

There are more serious warning signs that often get ignored.  Several of those signs were ignored or given the old "band aid treatment" and now 31 people on the Campus of Virginia Tech are no longer with us.  The only reason they are dead is because they were at the wrong place at the wrong time in the path of a mentally ill individual who was lashing out at representations of the aggressors in his own delusional world.   From what I have read and heard, this young man had issues; big issues.  These issues were documented and I would assume (it hasn't been verified by our sensationalist media yet) that treatment was applied, or attempted to be applied.  The young man had been determined by someone (a professional I'm assuming) to be "a threat to himself".  He was suicidal.  I wondering if this kid had any meds or was seeing a Therapist.  A definite warning sign if you ask me.  He had two complaints of stalking at Virginia Tech...two separate women said this guy was stalking them and they listened to their warning signs and reported him.  They were genuinely worried.  What was done to this young man?  Did Campus security think these ladies were just being silly??  Then we have his creative writing teacher.  She has said in numerous interviews that his writings scared her.  They were apparently filled with violence and psycho-sexual situations and language.  At the least someone didn't think this kid had the potential for rape??  Sounds like a serial killer in training if you ask me.  I'm not sure exactly what was done about this.  The teacher apparently brought this to the School heads attention, but what was done?   Three warning signs that pointed glaringly to a potential for violence and yet this kid was allowed to remain on campus.  What happened?  What should have been done?  I don't know school policy for Virginia Tech so I don't know what they could have done.  Like the Discourser says "If you aren't in the shit you don't know how you'd react".  He would know.  He has to interpret warning signs of danger all day long as a Middle School Administrator.  12 and 13 year olds with guns and knives and he has to determine who is the real danger, and who is just being stupid.  I was going to rant about how the school should have done more, but I thought about it.  From the outside looking in, it looks like everyone that has been involved in this young man's life dropped the ball.  Was it his parents fault he is this way?  Society?  A chemical imbalance that went untreated?  Childhood trauma that turned into delusion and murderous rage?  From where I sit, it looks like a lot of warning signs were there, but went horribly unheeded.  I'm not sure why campus wasn't evacuated after the first two shootings in the dorm?  Maybe security and the Police thought they had it contained and didn't want to cause a panic.  We all want to point the finger at someone.....I point the finger at the young man that chose to take two pistols and go on a rampage.  Was it video games?  No.  That's a convenient excuse.  That's like blaming Judas Priest because your kid listened to their music and took his life.  That's like Charles Manson saying the Beatle's song "Helter Skelter" told him to kill all those people.  Was it the easy access to weapons in this Country?  Not sure.  He apparently bought the weapons 5 weeks before.  Premeditation definitely but not "crime of passion".  He used a Credit Card and his background check was clean.  What does a background check check for anyway?  Criminal record most likely.  Felonious activity.  According to the owner of the store that sold the guns the kid seemed on the up and up.  Ted Bundy did too.  He was rather charming and well dressed, a good conversationalist as well.  What could have been done to keep weapons out of the hands of someone classified as "a danger to himself"??  Should a background check include a history of mental illness?  Should there be a waiting period?  Having never purchased a firearm other than a black powder pistol I don't know what the process is.  I know the gunshop folks can run a check to see if the person is a felon or not.  Felons cannot purchase guns.  I'm sure many find a way, but the up and up gun stores won't sell you one if you are a convicted felon.  Weapons are dangerous, but should the be taken away from us?  The NRA (National Redneck Association....okay that's not what it stands for, but it should...) loves to quote the Second Amendment to that document called the Constitution.  The right to bear arms (not to arm bears).  What they leave out is the whole statement which reads something like "The rights of the citizenry to bear arms against an arm aggressor as a part of a Citizen Militia".  Something like that.  In other words, you have the right to wield (bear) a firearm if you are a part of a Militia (the Minutemen is what it referred to actually) defending this Country from an aggressor.  It doesn't say that Ricky Bobby can own a full auto assault rifle for deer hunting.  The NRA disagrees.  I think that the average Joe needs to go through some kind of Hunter/Shooter safety class and apply for a license to own a weapon before he can purchase and use one.  Motorcycle riders have to go through a Motorcycle safety course before certain States will give them a drivers license, why not folks who want to use firearms.  Chaney could have benefited from a gun safety class that's for sure.  The City I live in has a once a month Hand Gun Safety class sponsored by the Police Department.  A great idea if you ask me.  I also wonder how it is that after Columbine in 1999, this still happens.  That was a huge warning sign, but yet we haven't done much to heed it.  4 planes were hijacked and flown into buildings on our soil and thousands of people were killed.  As a result, you and I had to give up a huge chunk of Civil Liberties so we can fly across Country.  We stand in line for hours, are limited to the amount of liquid we can bring on board, and lo and behold no planes have been intentionally flown into buildings since.  Maybe keeping our kids safe in schools isn't a Governmental priority.  From what the Discourser says, funds are tight and he has to account for every red cent.  I know the concept of seat belts on busses has been hashed about, but yet the School Districts and the State Boards of Education all have excuses why they can't put them in.  But yet, they enforce dress codes so that all kids come to school dressed the same.  Something has gotten skewed in our Society.  The glowing orange coil on the range is no longer hot....we have no idea what it is anymore.  It seems to me like we are just placing our hand down and ignoring the smell of burning flesh.  It seems to me like we are ignoring the screamingly obvious warning signs around us. 

Corporate Culture III: A Worker's Paradise

The best job I've ever had, and the place I'd still be working if circumstances with my Wife and the Donor of Genetic Material and custodial issues didn't go the way they went (this is why I'm a California transplant living in Tennessee), was at a Company originally known as Brian Kangas Foulk but later became BKF Engineers.  I had to desperately get out of Tricor, it just sucked.  I needed some new direction in life.  In 2000 I had officially been divorced for a year.  My good friend Mike's roommate was moving out of the apartment in Belmont, and I was getting ready to move in.  My first night in that apartment was the night before my first official day at BKF.  I remember interviewing there.  My boss Tita Bet knew I was looking for another job, and she didn't blame me.  She let me go early so I could go to the interview.  I met with two women, Linda and Maureen.  Linda was about my age (she's actually 2 years younger) and Maureen was an older woman (she's retired now).  They were both dressed in business suits, but my first impression was that Linda looked uncomfortable in hers (after working with her for 5 years my first impression was correct).  The funniest question they asked me was "Do you have a problem working with all women?"  I chuckled saying, "The last billing department I worked with was all women, I grew up in a small house with two women and one bathroom.  I have no problems working with women."  Linda then asked me, "would you have problems working for a woman supervisor.  Which would be me."  I replied that with the exception of Bob at UA, I've always had women supervisors and basically don't care what the person's gender, race, etc is as long as I'm treated fairly.  They seemed to like that.  Two days later they offered me the job.   I was introduced to "my girls" as I like to call them.  Debbie (tall blonde and was Disney's biggest fan), Yarka (older, short, from the Czech Republic and our "mom" basically),  Denise (short blonde car girl...big fan of Brian Setzer) and Janie (average height, Asian girl....with a large attitude).  I didn't have to sit in the same room as "my girls" (a Man can only take so much estrogen) instead I had my own Cube down the hall from them.  I was introduced to the President and CEO Dave LaVelle.  I was ready for "Mr. Corporate Hot Shot" or "Dysart the second"; instead I was introduced to "Hey, Dave LaVelle, nice to meet you.  So you are the new guy in Accounting eh?  Hope those girls don't drive you nuts." A very jovial guy, intelligent and actually was glad to meet you.  In the 5 years I worked there, I saw Dave LaVelle go out of his way to get to know the employees that worked for his Company.  200+ employees (a good portion Surveyors who are never in the office but in the field all day), and Dave knew who each one was.  A man who runs a multi-million dollar Engineering Firm who's projects include the Oracle Campus and Pixar Studios (basically a good portion of the Peninsula and Silicon Valley has been worked on by BKF) and has to look at the big picture all day still managed to make time to get to know us "grunts".   Impressive, and not very common.  You don't see Larry Ellison getting to know all 5,000+ of his employees at Oracle do you?  Yeah he's busy, but he doesn't care.  (this comes from several people who have worked at Oracle and have met him and pretty much that's their assessment.)  BKF is a privately held Corporation run by a board of Principal's/Vice-President's and the President/CEO.  Each of these folks has a financial stake in the Company.  It does good, they benefit.  If not, well they are looking for another job.  I actually found a job where I looked forward to going to work.  There was great morale at BKF.  We worked hard, but every once in awhile we cut loose and de-stressed.  One day a year after work we turned the office into a Mini-Golf course.  We would have our Bi-Monthly lunch meetings where the financial progress of the Company was discussed and new hires were recognized.  The Project Managers were encouraged to speak about the new things they had going on and what projects we won bids on.  Sometimes there was a theme to these lunches.  We had a Luau theme one time with the Accounting Girls and our Office Manager Kelly all dressed in grass skirts doing the Hula (I was on vacation that week or I'd have been in a grass skirt as well I'm sure.) while Dave LaVelle dressed in Hawaiian shirt and shorts and straw hat stood in a wading pool full of water and played Ukulele.   How can you not like working for a guy like that???  We used to do a Friday lunchtime jam session with folks bringing their guitars and myself bringing my bongos.  Dave would join in strumming on his guitar and even singing a little.  We moved from our little cramped office in Redwood City to an awesome office overlooking Redwood Shores Lagoon (across the street from EA).  Then I had to move to Tennessee.  They didn't want me to go, and honestly if I didn't love my Wife so much I wouldn't have gone.  But you know....a little thing called "the Love of my Life" happened and well...here I am.  No I'm not sorry I moved, I am just sorry I had to leave BKF.   Next time I will talk about my current crappy job where all the stereotypical office BS happens. 

American Bye-dol...

I've been hearing about this Sanjaya character on the show "American Idol" lately. There is already a wikipedia entry on this kid. Now I don't watch American Idol because basically it's a glorified Talent Show and that is boring to me. Hell I used to turn off Star Search when the singers were on (I always watched the Comedians though). This show has ruined Fox honestly. The Network that brought you Married With Children and The Simpsons, hasn't put out anything worth watching since Idol hit the airwaves. They aren't trying anymore, just riding the wave that is Idol. Part of this shows appeal is the audition shows. On these audition shows, every poor sap looking for his/her 15 minutes shows up to audition to make the final cut of the show. The majority of the people are like myself; couldn't carry a tune in a bucket with handles to save their lives. They do get a handful of really good ones. The part of these shows I despise, but it's what makes them popular is the judges brutal honesty. The main judge is named Simon Cowell. This guy is an arrogant prick, he really is. He has no musical talent himself, per se, but has been a record producer and involved in the music industry for years. He can be less rude to people when judging them, but chooses to be unusually cruel. Apparently people eat that crap up because the ruder he is, the higher the ratings. I don't understand the appeal of that. It's part of the reason I hate Howard Stern or anyone like him. I saw the best 60 Minutes segment where they had Simon on interviewing him, etc. There was a bit about him participating in a racing school owned by Mario Andretti. When he finished his laps, three drivers (including Andretti) judged him like he judges people on Idol. They basically told him he sucked and were just as rude. Simon didn't like it one bit apparently. So apparently this Sanjaya kid has made it pretty far and it's mostly on his looks. I guess the real appeal of idol is it's interactive nature. The viewing audience votes for who stays and who goes, not the folks on the show. You, yes you at home, can text your vote with your cell or vote online as many times as possible for the person you want to stay. Usually the public has good taste. Apparently this time around, at least according to Simon and the other judges, the public has lost their damn fool minds. This kid has butchered some songs and apparently should be gone by now. Simon and Co forget the most appealing thing about young male singers; their looks. Lets look at all the Boy Bands of long ago. You get 4-5 good looking, hip dudes; teach them some dance moves and over produce an album full of throwaway songs with a good beat. Presto chango you've got a cash cow on your hands. There's the appeal to this Sanjaya kid. The Tweens and teens love him and it's pissing Simon off. He has threatened to not do the show anymore if this kid wins. These comments have fueled Howard Stern to start an On-air radio campaign to have his listeners vote for Sanjaya as much as possible and hopefully to have this kid win. The populace has responded apparently and it looks like Idol may be about to Jump the Shark. Hopefully this will urge Fox to look into actually renewing Firefly or coming up with a good show for once (apparently 24 has jumped the shark big time....). I can honestly say I won't lose sleep if Idol goes Bye bye......


Edited: Apparently he has been voted off. I wonder if the results were purposely skewed that way....

Corporate Culture II: Wage Slave

In my last post I talked about my very first Corporate Culture experience at UA.  When the new guys took over, the culture was more relaxed and things actually got done more efficiently.  It's been proven again and again that when people are treated with respect and are encouraged to enjoy themselves while working (ie being able to listen to music, etc) they will be more productive and your business will thrive.  Unless you are an Internet startup with goofballs roller blading through the office and having Nerf gun wars but not doing any work.....but I digress.  It was also my first taste of Filipino food.   Ah, Lumpia......the egg rolls of the Gods.  We had two wonderful older Filipino women working in our Data Entry Department, our Aunties to be Culturally correct, who used to bring in tupperware containers full of Lumpia.....I must say, being raised in an ethnically diverse area of the World makes for some good eats.

 

I ended the last post talking about the "crappy" job.  The one I had from 1989-2000....yeah I know "if it sucked that much why were you still there?"  I am a stubborn bastard who sits and waits for the silver lining.   That crappy job was at a Company called Tricor.  The majority of the people I worked with were wonderful human beings of all walks of life.  The pay and the advancement opportunities sucked.  My boss was an older woman named Yolanda.  Yolanda was very old school and a workaholic.  She basically was "retiring" when I left in 2000, but still kept coming into the office, and my last boss there Elizabeth just told me the other day via email that Yolanda is now "unretired" and working again.   Your house is paid for, your Husband is a retired Union Butcher (big money pension there) and he keeps telling you "if you were retired you and I can go travel, etc....".   She doesn't need to work other than to alleviate boredom.  This was the first time I also experienced reverse discrimination.  The Company was run and owned by Chee Louie, a man of Chinese Descent who was born in Kowloon.  He was a good man, honorable and hard working, but he often engaged in reverse discrimination.  If you were Asian you got the promotions whether or not they were deserved.   It was interesting.  Being Sicilian I've never experienced people discriminating against me for my ethnicity, they usually consider Italians as "White".  Please don't think that way.  I have never considered myself White.  My old Friend Peter's Parents were the epitome of White.  Fathers and sons shake hand when they are older....no hugging allowed that kind of thing.  People have quiet conversations where one person speaks, then is prodded by another to respond (Brian if you are reading this you know what I mean....).  Italians kiss everyone, talk over each other and have no inside voices.  Now not every person that got promoted wasn't worthy of it, most were.  It was just strange to see discrimination on the other side.   This is also the job where I ended up with the position I've been in at every job I've worked; in the gossip loop.  Why me???  I don't seek it out, but yet I become part of the Chismoso chain.....thank you Tita Beth for that word...... I found out who was with who, doing who, hating who, etc.  It was bad.  I also had my first encounter with a Filipino American Princess.   Ah, Alice.  Such a wreck of a girl she was.  Probably still is.  In High School I dated a Jewish American Princess for about a month....it was fun but I hated "Daddy" paying for everything (I was raised you paid no matter what.  Italians think they are bigshots when throwing money around....its true.).  A pretty woman, but a wreck emotionally and mentally.  She believed the world revolved around her.  She was high maintenance, and I was single and stupid.  We did lunch a few times....it was good for my ego.....she introduced me to Filipino food other than Lumpia......Pansit, Adobo...oh Man it was good.  No I never ate Baloot, nor will I.  Baloot for those that don't know any Filipinos is a delicacy that consists of a fertilized duck egg eaten while still in it's fetal form.   Yarrrrhhhhhhhggggg!!!!  My Filipino friends gag at the mention of it.  When Yolanda semi-retired my boss was a woman named Elizabeth.  Auntie Bet or Tita Bet she was called.  That's a cultural quirk from the Polynesian influence on the Philippines.  In Hawaiian culture any older adult that is not related to you is called Auntie or Uncle.  You know the family friend, that person.   Filipinos use the same form of address.  I learned a little Tagalog (actually I impressed Auntie by figuring out what Hana gusta ma meant....), it was easy to pick up because there are a lot of Spanish words in Tagalog.  I learned Spanish in school (hey it's California, you better learn Spanish) and that helped.  Things were okay, until Chee decided to merge with a bunch of small Courier companies (oh yeah, Tricor is a Courier company...forgot to mention that) in a blocking maneuver to keep DHL from swallowing us up.  That worked, but it didn't stop another company from buying us.  Things changed then, it started to suck more.  Then the company was sold a second time, then a third.  It was that third time that I got my first taste of the "saying alot but not saying anything" type of Corporate guy.  I didn't like the way things were going so I actually found another job and was short timing it for my last two weeks.  This talking head from the new Corp came in to "alleviate our fears" about downsizing....I mean Layoffs (don't you hate PC terms?) and we had this big meeting.  He looked at us and said "Okay any questions I can answer?"  I, being the guy with nothing to lose since I was leaving for new employment, was the mouthpiece for my fellow employees.  I said "we were told you were supposed to come in and tell us everything that is going on."  He hemmed and hawed a bit then someone asked him a question and his response was "Hmmm that's a good point.  Let me take that back to my People and discuss it."  Or he would answer "Not sure about that.  Let me get back to you on it."  After dozens of non-replies I sarcastically answered for him before the meeting let out....I answered.."wait, let me guess, you will take it under advisement and get back to us...."  He was speechless.  It's a really fun feeling being free to say what you want without repercussions.  I was quitting, what were they going to do fire me????  I was glad I got out of there because 9/11 had a huge impact on that Company.  Tomorrow I will talk about the best job I've had; ever.

Corporate Culture

I've decided to do kind of a theme here.  First I discussed the Counter Culture, next I will discuss Corporate Culture after that, who knows.   I have always liked learning about other Cultures; whether ethnic, spiritual or socio-economic, I've always felt it helps one become a truly tolerant and well rounded human being if you understand what makes your fellow humans tick. 

 

Corporate Culture is something I have experienced since I first entered the world of "Cube Land" back in 1983.  Yep, when I graduated from High School back then, I went directly to a Junior College (the College of San Mateo) and my parents basically told me I'd have to pay for some of it because they couldn't pay for it all.  We found a job in the paper working at an office Downtown in SB for United Artists Communications, Inc.  I was a part-time stock boy who worked from 12pm until 5pm.  It was perfect, I went to school during the day, got out by 11 then went to work.  I was very quick about stocking the shelves and cleaning up in the back which left me with ample time to study; yes this was authorized by the boss....it was nice to basically get paid to study.  This was my first introduction to Corporate Culture.  Back then, people were allowed to smoke at their desks as long as there was a fan above them.......thank God that's changed.  The main boss of the office, the VP, was the stereotype of the fat, corporate, white, businessman.  He was way overweight, smoked like a chimney, and insisted we call him Mr. Dysart.  He mumbled somewhat when he talked (the 200 or so extra pounds probably the cause of that) and he reminded me of the stereotype of the "old school" Corporate "Company Man".  My immediate Supervisor was the complete opposite.  A cute and bubbly young woman in her mid 20's, Joan wasn't quite the cold and calculating "Corporate Climber", she was actually nice.  She was also just working to put her Hubby through school (he was learning to be a Chiropractor) and when he graduated, she left to be his bookkeeper.  Here I was an 18 year old kid just out of High School and being thrust into the world of "Adults".  It was a great experience.  I learned much tolerance in that job.  When I first started working at UA Joan took me around to introduce me to my fellow Co-Workers.  Basically, "Hey meet the New Guy..", that kind of thing.  The most memorable introduction was when I met my first real Gay person.  No big deal in today's world, but remember this was 1983.  In 1981 we had the first Aids cases, but they were essentially ignored because the powers that be thought it was a disease that only struck Gay People.   They did this in the hopes they would all die or something I'm sure.  Let's just pause for a moment and let that sink in.  I guess the "Geniuses" running our Country actually thought there was something different, physically and genetically, about Gay People that made a virus attack only them and no one else.    Apparently Gay People must be a separate species or something.  Anyway, because of all of this, I was a huge homophobe in High School.  I mean come one, a guy who wants to voluntarily kiss other guys and have sexual relations with them.........it just didn't sit right with me.   To clarify how I feel towards this today; I don't understand how a man can be gay, I honestly don't, but that doesn't mean that a gay man isn't a human being.   Everyone is different, and whether or not you agree with their lifestyles, you have to let people have the right to live their lives....Hell it's in the Constitution for Christsake!!!  So with that background, imagine an 18 year old male who is a homophobe shaking hands with a "real" gay person for the first time.   Said gay person, Ray was his name, was "very" gay if you know what I mean.  The effeminate type of gay man.  Here he was shaking my hand saying "hello Stephen, nice to meet you.".  I was polite and responded in kind, but the whole time in my head I was screaming "OH MY GOD A GAY DUDE TOUCHED ME!!!!  I'M GOING TO CATCH HIS GAYNESS NOW!!!!!!"  Yes I was that stupid.  In the six years I spent at that Company, Ray and the multiple other people that worked there and I all got along.  Then the Company was sold for 865 million (back in the 80's a crap load of money.....nowadays a drop in the bucket for a Corporation).  Well the new company decided to go head hunting and purge the old Management and install their own.  Dysart didn't like this and wasn't all to cooperative when he left.  In walked the Consultants.  Now remember this is the early 80's......about 85-86....and computers were housed in a Computer Room.....literally a huge room with large machines.  Oh yeah....old school IBM 4331's.  You know the kind, large banks of disk drives; remember the big 33 1/3 sized stacks....tape drives.....and even...wait for it....punch cards!!!!  Yeah, apparently Dysart was still using punch cards!?!?!?!?!  The Consultants came in (probably at about 200 bucks an hour or so.....big money in the 80's) and worked round the clock.  They kept to themselves, and we the grunts started to grumble and complain.  It looked like there would be no paychecks and that didn't sit well with us.  A few of the Consultants were sitting in the lunchroom one time and we all started talking amongst ourselves but loud enough for them to hear us say "No paychecks, nothing gets done.....".  Well as it happened, they came through and we got paid.  We got a new Office Manager named Dave Schumacher.  What a great guy.  Very businesslike, but could joke around with the best of them.  My immediate Supervisor was a guy named Bob Weiss.  You couldn't ask for a cooler guy to work for.  This job, unfortunately, was not long for the Bay Area as the new Corporation decided to move all Operations to New Jersey, and there wasn't any jobs for us out there.  I spent the rest of my career there helping Bob close down that office.  I wasn't allowed to go according to him.  He needed me to stay and help him close that place down.   This involved 2-3 hour lunches at the Pizza Parlor complete with a pitcher of beer (I was 21 by then) and about 2 hours of actual work.  My reward for this was a full paycheck at my normal pay periods (bi-monthly) for about 6 months.  It was nice to walk out the door every other Friday and get a paycheck in the mail for doing nothing......it also makes one lazy....too lazy to look for a better job.....I ended up getting a crappy one.....I'll blog about that next.

Counter Culture.....

Tonight a strangely titled movie hits theaters. "Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters" is the title of a feature film based on a 12 minute cartoon. All praise Cartoon Network and it's late night programming called "Adult Swim". It's a perfect example of the Counter Cultural coolness that can be found in today's world. Look at the characters. Frylock (the French Fries), Master Shake...(obvious) and Meatwad. It's a show about an animated Happy Meal for Christ sake. But, it's damn funny. Strange, weird, gory, odd but very funny. My Wife doesn't get it, but that's okay. Not everyone gets the odder humor of the world. My Stepson and I think it's hysterical. Look at the other examples of cultural oddness that is cool: South Park, Beavis and Butthead.......The Simpsons for crying out loud holds the record for longest running primtime animated series. Unheard of. The last one like that was "The Flintstones". I have a liking for some of the Anime out there, if it wasn't for Adult Swim I'd never have seen the "Ghost in the Shell" series or "Read or Die" or others. Awesome stuff as is the bizarre, anachronistic "Samurai Champloo"......Feudal Japan with one episode having a Samurai doing beat-box rap......don't ask, it was actually kind of cool. Counter Culture is what lead to "Burning Man" (the Perfect Line is a regular at this event), the Renaissance Faire (which Myself and the Perfect Line used to work) and the event I blogged about recently "The Running of the Big Wheels". Normal mundane folks don't dream up stuff like that, it's the creative ones who exist on the fringes or who just like to think like those on the fringes who are the driving force behind the Counter Cultural coolness.

Two For the Price of One....

Several little things to comment on today.  The first warranted a dedicated post: The Running of the Big Wheels.  Our buddy the Perfect Line was a participant in this event so I figured I'd give him a shout out on the old Blogarooni.  The second is a perfect example of what happens when high paid athletes think they are above the law: it bites them in the ass.  Adam "Pacman (Punkman)" Jones has been a Tennessee Titan for almost 3 seasons.  In those 3 seasons he has been in trouble with the law off the field a total of 10 times all of them in and out of Tennessee.  The latest incident is the most serious to date.  He and his thug buddies are at a strip club in Vegas.  Apparently they came in with a duffel bag full of cash (about 800K) and started flinging money around acting like they were all that.  Allegedly he started smacking some of the strippers around and a fight ensued with the bouncers and club security that ended in shots being fired from his group and a security guard paralyzed.  He's been drunk and disorderly, etc before all this.  He is on video using his being raised in the Atlanta projects as and excuse for his behavior.  His father was murdered when he was 6, and his mama spent some time in jail for drug possession.  He is also and admitted pot head.  He's managed in the past to stay out of serious trouble with the help of his high priced lawyers.  Not this time.  The NFL Commissioner has suspended him for the entire upcoming Football Season without pay and he is told to stay away from the Titans.   The Titans owner has said that as far as he's concerned the team will go forward as if Jones isn't coming back.  Harsh words, but it's what had to be done.   I honestly don't get these guys.  You start with nothing but manage to keep ahead of the crap by being good at sports.  You get all kinds of scholarships, etc and you are drafted right out of college by an NFL team and paid a huge salary.  You now have the means to want for nothing.  You can bail your family out of the projects and make life better for yourself.  Okay so he's 23, that's no excuse to be stupid.  Does this guy honestly think he's going to be Teflon coated when it comes to the police????  Just ask Jose Canseco.  When he was an Oakland A, he had a temper and was a party guy.  He also thought he was above the law, but soon realize that he wasn't.  Morons.  Grow the Hell up and get a clue.  Next we have a further rant about the youth of today.  Last night the Metro Nashville School District just passed a dress code for K-12.  Khaki pants and collared shirts, tucked in of course.  Their reasoning:  It makes all students equal, it's harder to hide weapons in non-baggy clothes, it helps the kids focus on studying instead of trying to be the fashion Diva.  Hey I think it's a great idea.  Most of the students, of course, don't think so.  They say "it cracksdown on our right to self expression"....yeah whatever.   Here's their self expression:  Pants that are a size or two too big that are worn with boxer shorts underneath.  The pants are pulled down past the butt cheeks and held in place with a belt while the boxers are exposed.  Over this comes a t-shirt, long sleeve, and a sports team uniform top (baseball style, football style, etc) worn very large and baggy.  Add to this some kind of ball cap turned at an angle.  So I guess "brain damaged, clown who can't dress himself properly and likes to wear his underwear hanging out his pants and likes to waddle when he walks" is the expression they are trying to make.  Wow......I feel so secure in the future of this Country.   This is the boys.  Now for the girls.  The expression they are trying to make is this:  take one t-shirt way too small so it is tight enough to see the seams of the bra you are wearing and comes down to the bottom of ones rib cage exposing belly, belly button and small of back to God and everyone.  Now add pants that come up to just below the points of the hip bone which probably necessitates the waxing or shaving of the bikini line because said pants aren't covering much up down there.  It also probably leads to the habit of "going commando" when it comes to underwear (in other words, none).  Oh yeah, the t-shirt is usually scoop neck and the more endowed young ladies are spilling out of the top of said shirt.  So I guess "15 year old whore who might as well just come to school naked" is the expression they are trying to make.  Whine, whine whine.  Guess what?  It's your own damn faults.  You dress like morons and come to school "packing" the shit is going to hit the fan.  The adults who have all the rights and run the world are going to reach a breaking point and say, enough is enough.  Oh, and God forbid girls.....if you are slightly overweight, and hey who isn't these days, please don't wear the belly shirts.......That's like me wearing a Speedo.  Hell I don't take my shirt off for fear of scaring small children emotionally with my flab and hairy countenance. Having supervised mall excursions and dress codes are the fruits of what you have sown.  You think there are no consequences to your actions.  WRONG!!!!!  What gets me is parents and principals complaining about this saying "some folks can't afford these clothes".  My ass.  They can afford Sean John and Nike and all that bling.....they can afford khakis and a polo shirt.  Hell Wal-Mart will have them super cheap as does Old Navy.  Ross and TJ Maxx have khakis and polos all at usually under 10 bucks. I remember when we were in school, it was jeans and t-shirts, or Dockers and Polo's with Top Siders.  Girls wore the same, sometimes the wore skirts or dresses.  Even the thugs wore jeans and t-shirts and derby jackets....even wore combat boots.  We looked like human beings.  None of the girls I went to school with dressed like whores.  They wore tight jeans....but they came up to their waistline not their hip joints.  The more endowed girls wore tight t-shirts, but it was their size!!!  No exposed bellies.  Even the Chicano dudes wore clothes that fit them.....they were the "rebel" dudes back then.  The silliest thing they wore were hair nets(I'm still not sure why) or bandannas around their heads that came down over their eyes......the solution, faculty told them to take the bandannas off.  Simple.  No bitching about "rights" or freedom of expression.  They took their bandannas off and all was cool. 

The Running of the Big Wheels

Click on the blog title to be taken to a slideshow of this event. Apparently it is a new Easter tradition for hoards of adults to ride Big Wheels down Lombard Street (the world's crookedest street) in San Francisco. Looks like it was fun and according to one of the participants, our buddy Rodger the Perfect Line, it was an absolute blast. He is pictured on slide number 5. He's the guy in the blue racing coveralls and the black full-face helmet. He had a helmet cam running and his roommate is going to edit the footage and post it up on Youtube. I'll update with the link to it when I get it.

Zero Tolerance

This is a comment from the Discourser to my FAA post

"
The Discourser said...
Let the hatred flow through you! You are so angry! I love it... "

He's right.....and I thank him for the comment. Yes I do get angry, thus my handle of "The Ranter". I've always had zero tolerance for stupidity. Common sense is something that you are taught in school and something you aquire from the world around you; yet there are loads of folks who refuse to or are too lazy to use their God-given common sense. Darwin was half right, we have encoded in our DNA primitive urges from our early prehistoric ancestors. Fight of Flight....you've heard that term before. When confronted with danger human beings either become aggressive (fight) or passive (flight) and we react accordingly. We either meet danger head on, or run the Hell away. We've all experienced this, but honestly can you remember ever being taught how to react to danger? Possibly your parents told you to fear strangers when you were a child, but as you get older your attitude towards strangers changes. So where does the Fight or Flight come from? We are born with it, just like cats somehow know what a litter box is and what to do with it. Honestly, I've never had to train any of the cats I've owned to use a litter box. They just know. So there are all these things encoded into our psyche at the genetic level, but we often ignore them. This is what I mean by stupidity. When you were growing up, you were taught manners (I'm hoping you were...if not by your parents, then Grandparents, Sunday School Teacher, regular School Teacher, whomever), yet there are still adults out there who have no common courtesy for the other people in the world around them. Sometimes these people are just downright rude, other times they are too nice and end up holding up the works. Good examples of both. Rude people: At the Hollywood Video store there are several cashiers and usually one long line with folks going to whicheve cashier is open from the single cue. Now inevitably there is one to two groups of folks who will ignore the line and start their own, or just walk up to the first open cashier they see. They know the line is there, they choose to be ignorant of it's existence and therefore they cut in line. Here in Tennessee, folks are very nice and let idiots like this get away with it; not me. Someone tried that once and I basically told them "Excuse me, see this big line here behind me, you need to be in it. Preferably at the back of it." I was shot a look, but the persons moved. See...stupidity, I have zero tolerance for that. Or when you pull up to a parking space and you have your blinker on and are waiting for someone to come out. Inevitably someone scoots out of nowhere and jumps into the space, "oblivious" to your prescence. Sure they are. I usually tell these assholes off. They get indignant, and yes I don't get the parking spot, but it made me feel vindicated to inform Mr/Mrs Head up their ass that the reason they are alive is because it is simply illegal to kill them. Now for an example of too nice. Too nice, what's wrong with that? Plenty. There are certain times of the day and certain places where being too nice causes more problems with the people around you than it helps. Case in point. Traffic lights and signs are setup the way they are based on Civil Engineering Traffic Studies. Traffic flows heavier in one direction than it does others. The point of traffic signage, etc is to alleviate backups. Now, if every single driver drove like he/she was supposed to, these traffic flow models would work perfectly. Yeah right! There is one large intersection that crosses over Interstate 24. It's the exit I take off of the Interstate to go home. There are two turn lanes going left, and one going right. Most people go left. Alot of Semis go left as well.....there is a huge truck stop near one of the traffic lights down the way. Now there is a driveway that empties onto the main road (the one you are on when you turn left). This driveway has a stop sign and people coming out of the driveway are supposed to wait on the cross traffic. The cross traffic is very heavy (like I said most drivers turn left) and needs to flow smoothly through so the intersections will not become blocked. Well, along comes some "good intentioned" soul who stops to let some semi out of the parking lot (said semi has a stop sign and does not have the right of way). This "nice" person by their actions ends up backing up traffic all the way down to the Interstate. Oh yeah, and there are the idiots who think that just because the light is green they have to go through it...even if that means blocking the intersection. So this one "good intention" has done the following: Stopped the flow of traffic. Made people miss the traffic light cycle not once but twice. Cause other morons to block the intersections causing other backups on other feeder roads coming into this main road. The semi of course can't make it all the way across because traffic coming the other direction has had their lights cycle green so now we have the "good samaritan" plus a dozen or more cars behind them blocking intersections and missing traffic light cycles. The semi has blocke both forward lanes because it is a Ginormous Semi. The person was trying to be courteous, I will give them that, but they were stupid in the fact that they didn't stop to think what time of day it is (rush hour), they didn't stop to look in their rear view mirror to realize there is a line of cars behind them, didn't stop to think of the fact that instead of going on a gree light (which was their green light) they stopped to be courteous to a Semi (Semi drivers around Tennessee are the hugest assholes I've ever met). The operative word here is "think". They didn't use their common sense that if they had listened to it would have told them "Hey, this semi is never going to make it, you have a green light, they have a stop sign. There are a billion people behind you all in a big hurry to get home from 8 hours of Hell stuck in a cubicle somewhere so maybe you shouldn't stop in the middle of the road to let some asshole trucker through so he could block the road and cause road rage." Someone with common sense would have driven through the green light and not impeded the forward flow of traffic. Near my house they changed the roadway around a bit because of the strip mall they built. Where you used to be able to make a left turn into the Cracker Barrel parking lot, now you cannot. There is a huge sign that says "No Left Turn". There is a large "Do Not Enter" sign where the roadway in used to be. Inevitably there is an idiot that thinks the law doesn't apply to them and holds up traffic trying to make an illegal left turn. Now there is room on the right hand side of this idiot to go around. Do you think the average Middle Tennessee driver goes around? Do you think they honk their horn at the offender to try and get them to go straight? Hell no!!! These idiots sit in line behind this schmuck waiting!!!! One day Cat and I were driving up somewhere and got stuck behind one of these schmucks....we were blowing the horn and I was yelling "hey dork...see the big sign that says no left turn....". The person in front of us (not the dork but some other moron) got pissed at us. We sped around them all and I gave them a drive by universal finger gesture. I only wish I had an AK47 with a full mag. People don't want to make waves out here. Bullshit.....I like to cause tsunami's. I want to make a bunch of invitations that read "You are cordially invited to please remove yourself from the gene pool." and give them to these idiots. Lord save me from the terminally stupid.

The FAA Makes a Smart Decision

Finally the FAA has admitted that cell phones have no affect on the instruments in the cockpit.   We all knew that.  If radio waves affected airplane instrumentation, planes would have been dropping from the sky a long time ago.  The broadcast from radio, tv, satellite, and cell towers puts out so much radio activity that the sky is covered with it.  They finally admitted that the reason they don't want you to use your cell phone is because it is rude.  Yep, rude.   I applaud them for this.  One of the things I despise the most is people in restaurants, church, theaters, etc yakking away on their damn phones.  Yeah they are great devices (I have one).   When I stop by the grocery on my way home, I call Cat and ask if there is anything else she thinks we need.  Handy.  I don't walk around the store shopping and yakking at the same time, and I certainly don't continue yakking while making my purchase (another thing I hate).  People have lost all sense of manners lately.  In the past 7 years I'd say folks have forgot that there are other people in the world other than themselves.   Here's a good example.  BTW, this person should win the award for "worst mother of the year".  This young mother walks into Cracker Barrel with her two toddlers.  She looks barely 20 and the kids both look like they are 4 and 5 years old.  This chick has been yakking on her cell phone since she walked into the restaurant.  She parks her kids, points to the menu and indicates (not once stopping her conversation mind you) to the kids to pick what they want to eat, stands up, walks away from her children to tell one of the waitresses something (still talking on her cell mind you).  She is gone 5 minutes tops, now realize she has left two toddlers at a table by themselves (and they wonder why kids get snatched), comes back (still yakking on the phone), pauses long enough to order (the person is still on the phone with her) then goes back to yakking.  Meanwhile her kids are being ignored by her (something tells me this goes on alot with this bimbo) and they are bored so the start poking at each other, etc.  One gets up and wanders around, she ignores this and keeps yakking.  Finally her food comes and she rounds up the wanderer (still on the phone......) and they begin to eat.  Mind you even though she is now shoving food into her gob she is STILL YAKKING ON HER DAMN PHONE!!!!  Remember when you were kids and your friends called at dinner time?  What happened?  I know in my house the caller was told "we are eating dinner right now, he will call you when he is done."  I did that last night with my child's friend.  I told her Liv was sitting down to eat and would call when she was done.  Now I know why places like O'Charley's and Red Robin make their background noises loud.....it keeps the buzz of conversation going at a level loud enough to not be annoying, but loud enough to discourage any cell phone yakkers.  Then there are the texters.   What is so freaking important to say that you are willing to pay 10 bucks for a movie so you can ignore it and punch a text message into a cell phone????  I have thrown objects at cell phone offenders in theaters before.  Then there are the loud talkers.  You know these guys.  The encounter goes something like this: "WHAT!! OH YEAH SHE SAID....."  "I KNOW...HOLY SHIT..." Uh, Dude, I got my kid with me and frankly I don't want to hear about your girlfriend or what she said.  These people get into their own little freaking worlds and forget the simple fact of life: The universe doesn't revolve around you; no matter how much you think it does.  What gets me too is when you look at them with "THE LOOK" (you know the look that says "hey bonehead do you mind?") they give you the facial equivalent of the middle finger.   Like I'm in the wrong????  I read a comment to an article where someone said that a loud yakker had the audacity to tell the person "Do you mind not listening to my conversation.  Why don't you move and give me some privacy.".....the person moved (now that pisses me off) because they were so stunned at someone's rudeness that they didn't know what to do.   Oh....I dare someone to do that to me.  I will start talking loudly, getting into their face, and generally ruin their conversation to the point they will either go somewhere else, or give me a good reason to snatch the phone from their hands and hang up their call.   My point is, can you imagine what it would be like trapped in coach on a cross country flight with the loud yakker, the constant yakker, or the texter???  Can you????  God I think the Air Marshall would have to drag me off of someone as I was stuffing their phone down their throat.  Thank you FAA, thank you. 

Rant Coming!!!

Click on the blog entry to be taken to SF Gate.com to read an article on mall policies regarding unsupervised teens (16 and under) being barred from malls unless they have a parent present. I think it's a great freaking idea. A mall is a place to do commerce, ie SHOP!! It's not a place to hang out or roam around in packs causing trouble or doing stupid shit. Ready??? Rant time.

Okay so in the article it says Teens have huge buying power. Excuse me? With who's money? Their parents maybe, unless they are as lucky as the Perfect Line and get a job in Corporate America at age 16. Usually they are working retail or fast food and making just above minimum. Oh and these poor teens feel like they aren't getting good customer service because folks react to them differently when the come into a store unsupervised. Why is that I wonder? My Wife works at Ross. Two teen girls walked into the store intending to do some shopping. They were. Enter a pack of teen boys walking by who's only purpose was to go into the store and act up trying to impress the girls. The whole batch was asked to leave. Hmmm....so unfair....give me a break. One of the malls out here Hickory Hollow Mall used to be the mall to go to. Now it's the mall to go to if you want to get into a gang fight or get car jacked in the parking lot. Hmmmmm......yes we are so unfair to Teens. Do they pay taxes? No (most don't have taxes taken out because they make so little). Do they vote? Unless they are 18, hell no!! ( and sometimes even when they are 18 they don't bother). If you are truly in the mall to Shop, then why is being with your folks so wrong. It's your own damn fault kids. You and your generation of rude, disrespectful kids growing up with the attitude that everyone owes you. Yeah, we owe you...a kick in the ass is what we owe you. Everytime I read this I want to kick some punk in the ass so he gets the point. If the majority of teens acted in a civillized manner then there would be no need for this. When I was a teen, we didn't act like little assholes in the mall, the Security Guards would have kicked us out. Face it kids, you end up on Myspace hiding from your folks and going off to meet dirty old men for sex...why, because your bored!!!! The government made sure you were wrapped in bubble wrap and foam so you didn't get hurt. You grew up playing sports where "everyone is a winner". Your mediocrity was applauded. Hey you gave it a shot.....no you didn't, you expended the minimal effort and energy to get it done. You have everything you need at your fingertips and really haven't had to work hard for nothing. You get cruised through school. Hell sometimes they don't give you homework because its "not fair". All this is doing is ill preparing you for the real world. The real world is not a nice place. So when your parents drop you off at the mall and use it as a babysitter and you screw that up by being jerk offs, yeah we the Adults that run this world are going to fight back. You're rights end at your parents front door. If I am a store owner and you and a pack of thugs come into my store and I don't like the look of you, I'm calling the cops or chasing your asses out. You don't like it; then pull your damn pants up, ditch the giant gold chain and gold teeth covers, wear your damn ball cap the way it's supposed to be worn and stop trying to be 50 cent or Snoop Dogg. Simple. Dress like a human being, act like one and you will be treated like one. Act like a punk ass, and I will assume you are a punk ass. Simple. Girls, you are 15-16 years old. You aren't whores so stop dressing like you are. Liv may not be my biological daughter, but she goes out of the house looking like a tramp...I'll kill her. So if you want all of this to stop, start wising up and start learning to act like civilized people again. If you want respect, you have to earn it.

LARPers

Recently on the yahoo gaming group that the Discourser, Ntt, the Supergoober, the Perfect Line and Myself all belong to there has been many a post and discussion about the term LARPing. The Discourser has found many a video on Youtube regarding these pathetic individuals which has angered the Perfect Line into saying, and I quote loosely "F*** some people need to step up and let the world know that not ALL role players are the f***ing anal crust of the earth. I mean these people are the little balls of toilet paper that get stuck in your a** hair, they are the farts that stain your titey whities, ". Wow RB, tell us how you REALLY feel....LOL. It's true though. It's very scary. Now, LARPing for those that are fortunate to not know, stands for Live Action Role Playing. Basically what we gamers do but for real. Yep, instead of the character being on a piece of paper and rolling dice, etc, these freaks dress up in bad costumes and wield padded sticks that are covered in duct tape and "look" like swords, axes etc. Trust me, do a search on Youtube for "LARP" and you will get some of the most funniest, but scariest because they are true, videos of these "people". These guys go out to playgrounds, private homes, campsites, wherever and run around and hit each other with swords. Some of them play Wizards and throw little foam bolts of lightning shouting "Lightning bolt. Lightning bolt." It's very sad. Now I know what you may be thinking; but Steve, you used to do Ren Faire and Dickens Fair. Yep I did. The difference, I was performing for an audience. I didn't live the life of the characters I portrayed. When Fair was over, I changed into street clothes and became "Steve" again....actually most of the day I was "Steve playing a part in a performance". I never for once believed I was "Talon" the Pirate at Ren Faired. I knew that the "Cardiff Rose" wasn't a real Pirate Ship but a ficticious background story and setting that all of us who worked for Greg Pursley's Fencing Booth at Ren Faire shared so we could portray our characters better. It's like when the Royal Shakes puts on MacBeth.......everyone on stage pretends they are in Scotland, even though they are actually in a building in London. LARPers often times don't make the distinction between reality and fantasy. The majority of the LARPers I ran into at gaming conventions were the Vampire types. Oh they thought they were cool and mysterious. They weren't a part of the convention per se (kind of like Mickey Mouse is part of Disneyland so he/she has to be "Mickey Mouse" while out in the park) they are just participants like me and everyone else. They walk around all day though, even when not part of a game, pretending to be Vampires. I used to piss them off by giving them grief about being a vampire. I'd suggest that if they really were Vampires, they wouldn't be walking around a hotel lobby with lots of windows during the day. I'd also suggest they go outside and stand in the sun to prove that they were real vampires (hey if they were, then I'd be a hero by killing off the evil night creatures that they are........). Performing in costume is fun, but when the performance is done it's time to get back to the real world. Celebrities hate it when people ask them about episodes and stuff. Claudia Christen (of Babylon 5 fame) came to our fencing booth at Faire one year. Her friend John (not a celebrity) is a fencer and knows Greg and she wanted a fencing lesson. She was relieved that we weren't asking her a billion questions about the show. We as a group actually had a better time just hanging out and talking fencing with her. Celebrities don't remember how they "felt" when the aliens were attacking them. Most actors "feel" what the director tells them to "feel" when filming, and most "aliens" aren't even there when the episode is filmed. Oh yeah, and they often film stuff way out of sequence and edit it together later. Anyway, back on rant.......

LARPers are the kind of Geeks that real Geeks want to beat up. Now I will close because I've given them way more time than they deserve.

Won't someone shut her up?????

So you are going to get two today since I've been lax. The "her" I'm referring to is Rosie "I think I'm so damn clever and funny but really I'm just a grouchy burly mountain woman" O' Donnel. Yep, the queen of annoying herself. Number 1, let me just say that the show "The View" is the most annoying show on TV. You have a bunch of over-the-hill wenches whinning about everything and anything. To think I used to have respect for Barbara WaWa too.....jeez!!! Well first Grossie rags on The Donald.....he deserves it for he is an ass, but I digress......then she rags on other things, now she's making light of the Menu Foods pet food poisoning. She made some kind of remark about how 16 pets dying (I just read an article by on SFGate.com about how it's more like 8,000+ and rising and that Menu Foods tried to cover it up) makes the news but 29 soldiers dying in Iraq don't. Ummmmm Grossie, last time I checked, the news I watch and listen too and read always reports the death of soldiers. Stupid b***h!!! Shut the Hell up and keep you Politics to yourself. No one cares anymore. Just Shut up!!!! Bushco is going to keep those boys and girls there until he leaves office and we all know it. Short of impeaching the moron (trust me I'm not going to suggest shoot....Chaney would love that and then we'd all be screwed) there's nothing the Democratice majority can do to stop the Veto stamp. It's a shame really. Those troops need to start packing up and coming home......there is no way to stop terrorism or insurgency; none. Short of declaring the Country of Iraq the 51rst State, there is not way to stop it. The Discourser will agree with me about "The View".....he refers to it as the Unholy Tivo.