This installment will be about folks who open up businesses but have no business running a business. Say that five times fast. Anyhow, I've always been of the mindset that if you don't have any clue of what it takes to run a business, then you should go get yourself a clue before you open one up. Learn about inventory, pricing, location, advertising, hours of operation, etc etc..... In the City I live in, we've had several examples of "what not to do" when running a business. There is a chain called NYPD for New York Pizza Deli. One opened up in the Providence Mall near my home. They were advertised as being a deli style pizza restaurant where you could order by the slice or the pie. Things were bad when they first opened as they were only open the first week to friends of the owner. Excuse me? Bad form. When they were finally opened to the public, there was no ordering by the slice...or if you wanted by the slice it would take several minutes....say 15.....it was like they were saying "it's an annoyance for us to do that even though our Franchise says we have to". We went in the sign said please wait to be seated. There was a dozen folks working but no one sat us. An employee on his way out the door told us to go sit wherever and someone will come to take our order. Okay. We did, and the waitress who's section it was just kept giving us funny looks. Didn't come over and ask if she could help us or nothing, just kept giving us looks. Finally she came over and said something to the effect of "Did someone tell you to sit in my area?" Which I interpreted to mean "I don't want to have to work real hard tonight so why did someone seat you in my area?". She took our drink order and food order (we had waited long enough that we actually decided on what we wanted at that point) and we never saw her again. Oh, she came by to the other tables, but didn't once ask if we needed refills, how the food was, nothing. Other wait staff delivered our food and drinks. Hell I even had to get another waitress to get our check. I went up to the counter to pay (it looked like that's where you paid) and the owner gave me a funny look like "why are you up here to pay?". We chalked it up to new restaurant, shitty staff. We went again a few weeks later. We had to wait to be seated again, this time someone actually sat us right away. The waitress then gave us our menus and said "When you are ready to order just go up to the counter and order." Okay, last straw. We left. If I have to wait to be seated, and you have wait staff, then you are going to take my order and bring my food to me. If I have to go stand in line and order it, then I get to sit where I want and don't expect a tip. They have since changed their name to NYYP or New York New York Pizza. I think they got their franchise pulled on them so just fudged the name to stay in business. Honestly, it could be a crowded place, but it's not. They suck that much. Prime example of know what the hell you are doing before you open a business. Now it may seem like I'm being petty, but honestly make up your damn mind. What kind of restaurant are you? It's like I won't go to a Korean BBQ restaurant. I'm sure the food is good, but I'm not paying for food and service at a restaurant where I'm expected to cook my own damn food. If you are not familiar with a Korean BBQ restaurant, they work like this. There is a hibachi grill in the center of the table. You order the food you want and it is brought out to you raw. You are then supposed to use the grill to cook it the way you like it. Of course their prices are still the same as if a chef cooked it for you and the waiters still expect a tip. I know Papa Murphy's pizza is cheaper because you take it home and cook it. That's fine by me. If I have to do some work then you cut the price. It's cheaper to wash your car yourself than go through a car wash.
Another example is a coffee chain we have in our mall. No it's not Starbucks it's called Billy Goat Coffee Company. These folks issue is they are too damn expensive. Hell Starbucks is cheaper. We had two coffees and two slices of cheesecake...total 18 bucks! You'd think a place like that who is trying to compete with Starbucks would be cheaper than...but no.
Another example is a place that has seasonal stuff. Here in Tennessee we have actual winter. It's not like Michigan, but it gets damn cold still. One of the first casualties of the new mall is the Keva Juice. Think Jamba Juice for my California friends. Healthy smoothies....heck smoothies in general are really only a summer treat. Even then they weren't that busy. I chalk it up to the fact that I live in the 3rd Fattest state in the union and smoothies are a "Yankee" invention. Maybe if they called the Heavenly Smoothies and the cups came with a Jesus fish on them.....but I digress.
Then you've got the NIMBY business folks who have been here for years. For those that don't know the acronym it stands for Not In My Backyard. These are the one's that were used to the City being a small, sleepy bedroom community with a smattering of businesses. Heck the only prevalent businesses were Lawyers, Real Estate Agents, Insurance Brokers and Mortgage Brokers. Then the mall came in. It increased the population, okay the new housing that came with the mall helped with that, and increased the sales tax revenue. But yet, we still have the NIMBY's who have copped a bad attitude and refuse to change to compete. There's a little coffee/lunch counter place in our City. I've never been there because their hours are the most inconvenient ever. Our City is a commuter City. Folks live here because they work in Nashville but don't want the hassle of living in a major City. There aren't many office buildings in our City, nor is there the headquarters of any large corp, etc. People drive away from Town to go to work, not into town. Yet, this coffee shop is only open Monday - Friday from 8am to 5pm. The owner has always had an attitude about everything. I'm sorry, you bitch about no business, or that the "mall is taking" your business but yet you refuse to compete with the mall. She's also in a crappy location. A two lane road that is majorly busy and it makes it unsafe to get to her shop from one side of the road, and even worse to try and get out of the parking lot. Bad location, bad attitude, bad hours=no business.
Another example are Hobby Lobby and Chik-Fil-A. Both run by Christian corporations......neither open on Sunday. Now one is a Hobby/Craft store and the other is a Chicken Fast Food place. From what I know of Church around here, you are there the majority of the morning and get out about 11:30am. Most folks work M-F and do chores/errands on the weekends. Chik-Fil-A not being open....okay...they are open late and you can get the same food anytime of day. Hobby Lobby though, sorry, but folks shop on the weekends, even after Church. Hell people go out to eat after Church...trust me I know this from being at Cracker Barrel at the wrong time of morning on Sundays.......So why wouldn't you be open? Especially a Known Christian Corporation....guess where the Church folks would flock to eat at......exactly. Just not a smart idea. Banks too...they've always cracked me up when it came to their hours of business. I can see being closed on Sunday, heck the Post Office is, but on Saturday? At least most banks I've banked at had Saturday hours. They weren't that long, but hey they were open at least. But what always gets me is that their employees take lunch at the same hour as everyone else in the world. Why is that dumb you ask? Well if you have banking to do in person during the week, when do you do it? You go at your lunch break. So does everyone else in the world. But yet, that's the time the banks have the least staff on hand. Makes no freaking sense.
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