The Red State

(Update for yesterday's Infomercial blog.....the Double Action Colon Cleanse one was on again this morning....I stirred and heard the sounds of the Dweeb getting all excited about crapping....Man needs a life.)

The Red State, aka Tennessee, is where I relocated to after meeting my wondeful Wife Cathy on these here interweb things. We had the "pleasure" of being graced by the prescence of His Royal Moroness King George the Shrub yesterday. Wow!!! Ever notice he doesn't go where "real" people are? That's because he'd get crap thrown at him and several people flipping him off. I didn't think about, but every so often I shout "kill the president" into my cell phone when talking on it, just to see if the Homeland Gestapo is listening. They probably were yesterday. I find it strange that the majority of the people that live in this State are Middle Class, but yet they tend to vote for Conservative Republicans. Why? Do you actually think Conservative Republicans care about the Middle Class? They vote for these folks for their "High, Christian Morals...." Christian is a big deal out here. A real big deal. Still not used to the amount of Religion that permeates everyday life out here, and I don't think I will. That's okay, I don't care if folks think I'm blasphemous. I'm Italian; remember I've told you before we invented Heaven.....all Italians have a free pass. I do find it strange that when a Young Single Man who is running for office has attended a SuperBowl party sponsored by Playboy Magazine he is seen as the Devil incarnate. He's SINGLE.....what part of that is so bad. He also happened to be a member of the highly Political Ford Family from Memphis.......he started with a major handicap from the get go. So who did this state choose to represent us in Congress? A White, Conservative Republican who has done nothing. Way to go Tennessee.....the rest of the Country has pass you up again. It's like a bizarre time flux or something permeates parts of this State. There are still dry counties in Tennessee. I'm sorry, Prohibition was over 80+ years ago....time to catch up. This is why we don't have Trader Joe's out here. Supermarkets have bizarre rules on the types of alcohol they can sell. Kroger can sell Beer, but they can't sell wine, vodka, scotch etc. A liquor store is the only place you can buy wine, etc. But, a liquor store can only sell liquor. No Porn, cigarettes, etc. Liquor. These are really ancient purtianical laws that no one has bothered to abolish. Lynchburg, Tennessee where Jack Daniels is distilled is in a dry county. You can make it there apparently, but you can't drink it. But you can cross the county line to the next county and buy it and then bring it home. Did they really think making a county dry was going to keep folks from drinking? Morons. These things make no sense to me. I see billboards sponsored by churches saying "Real men don't use Porn. Real men love Jesus." Really Reverend? Ya think so? Like you never looked at a porn mag Rev when you were a pubesent boy. I also love how these Preachers are quick to teach love and understanding and how abortions are murder, but would be the first ones to cast the first stone if the laws allowed stoning Gay people. Hypocrite is the term that best fits here. "Real Men Love Jesus".....a strong statement filled with Man Love conotations. You're making Jesus sound Gay there Rev. Just saying. This State also has a tendency to forget the past. Lots of folks love to have that Good Ol' Confederate Flag plastered on everything. They say it's because they are "Rebels" or it's a "Southern Heritage Thing". Excuse me? I didn't realize that being on the losing side of a Civil Uprising against the legitimate Government was something to be proud of. Wow!! Let's have a parade!!! Hooray for us!! A bunch of farmers tried to take on the US Army and lost!!!! Woo hoo! Or should I say Yee Haw!!! Sorry folks, the Civil war came about because of a disagreement about a State's rights being overidden by the Federal Government's rights. In other words, the rest of the Country was freeing their slaves because President Lincoln (just he alone, there was no grouchy Beaver or Deep Sea Diver) signed an Constitutional Amendment saying to. The South said they "needed their slaves and should be allowed to do what they wanted to do." Really? Let's examine the name of our Country shall we. United States of America. United: Everyone joined in alliance behind a single idea or concept. Together, not separate. States: Individual sections of the Country. The idea of our Country was that we Unite as States, not colonies, so that we could better Govern ourselves and throw off the oppression of the corrupt British Parliment. Man was it corrupt back then. Apparently the Southern States had a tantrum because the majority of the Country felt that owning another human being and living under the concept of "All men are created equal" was a bit on the hypocritical side....oh yeah and it was just plain WRONG!!!! So let's examine this Southern Heritage. A bunch of rich landowners who were too damn cheap to hire someone to work for them decided to by a bunch of dark skinned "savages" and beat and harrass them into working long, hard hours because that's all they were good for. Oh yeah, and these "savages" were lower than dirt and like animals, but it was okay for the Rich, Fat, White landowner to go have sex with the females. Guess the sheep were good at running away. Yet in spite of all the proof that the Confederate Flag is almost as bad as the Nazi Flag, all these "cool" Southerners lie to themselves that it's not a "race" thing.....it's a "rebel" thing. Whatever. Rebel my ass. There is a nursery, a rather large one I might add, that Cath and I will not give any business too because this Moron flies not only the American Flag and the Tennessee State Flag but the Confederate Flag as well. Huh???? Makes no sense. The American Flag was the flag of the hated "Yankees" when your "Southern Freedom Fighters" were flying the Confederate Flag. Backwards Hick!!!! I'm all for preserving History, good and bad, because it should help us to learn what not to do ever again. But this is going beyond that. It's offensive to me. When you fly that flag you are telling me that it is okay to be a Racist. It's okay to treat people like sub-humans because of their skin color. Do you think Black people like that flag? Don't you think that's a bit offensive to them? It's like flying a Nazi flag in front of a Jew. Hell it's like flying a Nazi flag in front of most people. It's appaling. Folks tend to forget things out here. Fred Thompson (they guy that plays the DA on Law and Order) is a Tennesseean running for President. I hear lots of murmurs abouth how great he'd be, but yet folks forget he was kicked out of the Senate because of allegations of corruption. Yet you think this man would make a great President. Why? I personally would love to see Giulianni get in. A Catholic, Italian in the White House. That'd shake some shit up wouldn't it???? The Unions would be really strong again I bet. Maybe that's a bad thing.....sorry Dad....either Rudy or Barack.....not Hillary!!! Please no!!! She couldn't do it (and it's not because she's a woman....she's not qualified and she had her 8 years already....). Just think though.....Bill as the First Man.....no that wouldn't go to his head or anything. I do miss Bubba. It's my Blue State exposure that leads me to question the motives of the average Tenneessean. Historically Democrats have always fought on the side of the Average Joe and the Republicans on the side of Joe Corporation. So why again does Tenneesse tend to vote Republican?? Makes no sense to me. Oh I know....it's the perceived God thing. Yeah like a person's Faith qualifies them to be a good leader......

Although there is hope for The Red State: The local news channel did an online poll to see how folks felt about Shrub being here yesterday. The results? Almost half of Tenneesseans that took the poll voted for "Didn't Care". Now that's the sign of a true Lame Duck President if I've ever seen one.